Guardians Of The Cul-De-Sac

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I live in the presence of two greatest superheroes the South West has ever known. They don’t care who knows their secret identities, for they are that bad ass. They share their gift with the citizens of Fort Mohave, and the greater tri-state area when mommy says its okay.

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This is Turner AKA Turk AKA Captain Underpants. His superpower is selective deafness, and sleep deprivation. His mild mannered alter ego spends his time in 1st grade learning to read, but at night he hits the cul-de-sac in search of crime which he stops with his trusty nerf  cannon.

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This is Nova AKA Bunny AKA John Smith Rockstar. Her superpowers are deafening scream, stubbornness, and general cute attack. Her alter ego(s) spend their time trying to find more candy, and various other unhealthy snacks. Her superpowers are fueled by candy.

Together they form the greatest team of crime fighters and candy sneakers the world has ever known. In great comic book fashion, their nemesis is, none other than their older sister Kaylee also known by the duo as the wicked Butt-Sniff AKA GRR Kaywee!. Her plot to keep the team from her room, not to mention her stash of gum is thwarted on an almost daily basis by these freedom fighters.

Together they defend the cul-de-sac from evil. There is a dark side to this story as well. This team of brave heroes has a weakness. They have a Kryptonite that leaves them raging and uncooperative. This nefarious force is known by the public as Lego Batman the video game. The one thing that can destroy them.

For now though, the world is safe thanks to these two brave souls, these defenders of truth, chocolate and the elementary school way.